Living six hours away from home means I typically bake a phone call into my plans every Sunday afternoon. It is not a chore, nor is it vexing to spend an hour on the phone with my parents or other family members who might be around the house when I ring. I followed this usual pattern on Father’s Day last week and called my Pop to spend some time with him.
“Hey, it’s Pop” my Dad answered. He and my mother had attended church that morning, had gone out to eat for the sixth year in a row to “BJ’s” in celebration of the holiday, and were currently babysitting my 4 month old niece – relaxing Sunday no doubt.
We spoke about the usual – cars, jobs, family, etc. However, at the end of our conversation, I was able to thank my dad for many things he has taught me. My father educated me how to act right, treat people right, and be a man through words and actions. Without a doubt, the list of what I’ve consciously and subconsciously learned from my dad is interminable, but there is one very tangible item I can share, and that is a book.
Every time I came out of a piano lesson as a kid, my dad was there waiting for me, and he almost always was holding a book in one hand and a highlighter in the other. I recall my father highlighting sentences one Saturday in a book titled “How to Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie. Years later when I could read better, he suggested I study it. However, I thought the title of the book made it sound like it was for someone who was rather lame in the social scene.
Fast forward to my junior year of college. Ah college. Class, library, class, library, right? I cracked it open in the fall semester and have never been the same since. The book is a wonderful historical narrative about honing people skills to making yourself and others happy. Examples of Dale Carnegie’s principles are drawn from the likes of President Abraham Lincoln, steel giant Andrew Carnegie, the average shoe shop owner, and every day dog walkers. Dale Carnegie’s book turned into an adult education class that sold out and toured the nation due to its success stories. There are anecdotes about business owners selling more products, marriages being saved, and friendships being rekindled on every page. You may be thinking the lessons he goes through are complex but they are not. My friends, they are simply the most human things we can do sometimes. Below are a few tidbits from the book.
“You must have a good time meeting people if you expect them to have a good time meeting you.”
“I have discovered from personal experience that one can win the attention and time and cooperation of even the most sought-after people by becoming genuinely interested in them.”
“You cannot teach a man anything; you can only help him find it within himself.” – Galileo
“There is a certain degree of satisfaction in having the courage to admit one’s errors. It not only clears the air of guilt and defensiveness, but often helps solve the problem created by the error.”
“Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.”

These instructions have worked wonders for a variety of successful people. At its root, it’s simply being a polite human being. I hope you can use some of these ideas as you push forward.