Me, Myself and I…
Growing up, I felt a lot of pressure to succeed. Like many of us, growing up comes with challenges, but we never really sit and think about those coping skills to regulate our emotions through everyday stresses. Instead, we continue to work hard and keep pushing through to become resilient.
Statistically growing up in Detroit meant that I would not come from the best education and I would live a life of abject poverty subjected to both traumatic and chronic stresses. My mother and grandparents allowed me to have access to education both culturally and academically. I was privileged to participate in Boys & Girls Clubs, Girls Scouts, academic competitions and internships to distract myself from these stress factors. Resiliency was a survival tactic that helped me strive for success. However, I never really coped with stress.
What does it mean to have self-care?
How many of us practice self-care in our daily lives?… Not many, I’m sure.
I spent nearly two years trying to figure out “self-care” while working on obtaining my Masters in Social Work. In some ways, I still am developing self-care every day. For someone who has dealt with grief, depression, and anxiety over the last two years, it has become a personal journey to find self-care through self-love and compassion.
While at University taking classes, professors and friends always told me to take time for self-care, but what does that really mean? This struggle of self-care transcends beyond academics. It was the struggle to self-identify stability while balancing work, school and my personal life. When I thought about self-care, I wondered… Does that mean taking a break from the world around you when you feel tired from all of the stress? Is it finding yourself burying your feelings at the end of a bottle? Or is it giving yourself permission to hide all emotions and seek refuge in others?
Self Care
Self Care implies “taking care of one’s self”, which can be tackled in both negative and positive manners without guidance.
Self Care describes actions that an individual takes to obtain both good physical and mental health. Self Care is necessary for multiple reasons such as:
- Reduce stress
- Regulate emotions
- Maintain relationships
- Balance professional, academic & personal life.
Self-Care Wheel
To create a self-care regimen, you must identify what healthy aspects of self-care you may need for your basic needs to be met on the daily and long-term care. Daily self-care may be as basic as taking a moment to breathe & meditate, writing or spending time with family & friends. The long-term challenge starts when you start to identify the “Why”. Challenging yourself to think critically about your emotional and mental well-being is self-care. Ask yourself, “why am I feeling this?” or “why am I avoiding this…” Etc. (Check out the Self-Care Wheel)
A Life of Self Compassion
Self Compassion is being kind to yourself, mindful and normalizing your emotions. If you are not vulnerable to yourself, you will not be able to acknowledge the full potential of your strength.